Breaking up with myself

So we are into a new year, and  time for reflection. We all do it even if you say you don't, FB help us with add one etc...

I thought that I will stop drinking, become a responsible adult and settle down.......... "hannah your nearly 30 now', 'when  are you going to settle down', 'when are you going to find a man and marry', bla blah bla..... People ask the questions all the time, but I can't answer them, its all about timing. You got to be on the same page otherwise the book wont flow.

I have not had any alcohol since Friday 2nd, so far I am going good because last time I only lasted 3days. 

Not drinking, working ridiculous long hours  and hibernation equals lets go over my life through, Photos on Facebook. I have to say I have had a pretty bloody awesome life. Yes I have had my ups and downs, heart breaks, lost loved ones, and all the other bullshit, but honestly the Good times have out weighed the bad. (If I can't see that someone slap me now. The adventures of UNI, moving to Alice Springs, Moving to Mt Buller, Buying a caravan off EBay and naming him Vinny driving around Australia by myself with Big Tez (my car), living in Brisbane, and moving to UK. In all those adventures I meet life long friends, and  learned so much about myself. Honestly if I let fear run my life I would not have been able to do half of those adventures. Every single adventure has come with a rollercoaster of emotions. Its how you handle the first rollercoaster to help you handle the others and so on.

Ever since I was a teenager I always said 20's are about me, growing, making mistakes, learning traveling experiencing as much ash can so then in my 30's Id be happy to settled down (find man that can handle me) and even think about a family (honestly this scares the shit out of me, more fear of failing than anything). I am now at the tail end of the 20's and the mind starts pondering on what comes next as most of your closet friends have walked down the isle, had children or near walking down the isle. I am not in any way envy of my friends at their stages of their life, more happy than anything. Everyone life stages come differently but it does give your perspective on what you want in life. Honestly if I was to come to the UK now, I probably wouldn't.

 So I have decided to breakup with myself. Weird as it may sound (I even think so) but if I cant look into the Mirror and like what I see, then only I can change things. I am more breaking up with my excuses. I am over my excuses as why I don't go to the gym as much or exercise and my drunken binge on Maccas etc... I have grown up being fit most of my life and  having that balance with socialising, and yes traveling makes it hard as you don't care as much as your are out enjoying yourself, forgetting about your body image.  You can always rely on family members to be brutally honest when it comes your body, So why can't I do this over here travel and be fit. I have made some lifestyle changes for the better me. However one thing I am not going to change just yet is how sober I will be. I have spent the a good 80% of my 20's drinking and socialising so why stop that now when there is only 6months to go.

If I can train as hard as I have been partying I'll be fist pumping all the way home to Australia. Heathrow injection can kiss my butt.